UEFA 2020 - Why Soccer Sucks

 Time for one of my occasional notes on how to reform football, so traditionalists please retire to your fainting couches.  Italy vs. Spain.  Two excellent teams battle for two hours and then the winner is decided by flipping a blankety-blank coin. OK, a virtual coin.   The problem is that there are far too few decent scoring opportunities.  Defensive technique is just too good. 

Which reminds me: the penalty shot is an ugly wart on the game.  Most fouls in the penalty error aren't called because the penalty shot is ridiculously disproportionate. 

1) For a start, eliminate the penalty shot and replace it with a free kick from a penalty loop about 30 meters from the goal.  Call penalty area fouls aggressively - no tackling or shirt tugging allowed.

2) (This one due to Pele).  Replace throw-ins with kick-ins or punt-ins.  Possibly limit these to the back two thirds of the field (see below).

3) Divide the pitch into equal thirds, with the offside rule only applying in the final third.

And some technical details.

4) About those cute little robots that brought out the balls.  Use robot cameras and software to call offsides freeing a couple of more perfectly good referees to supervise on field action.  They would be more precise and accurate. 

5) Keep the official time on the scoreboard.

6) Mandatory temporary substitution of players with suspected head injuries.  If they pass concussion protocols they could be substituted back, one time.

UPDATE: Re laser incident.  England should be forfeited.  A large reward should be offered for arrest of the perpetrator..


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